Changing Careers? How to Get Around the Three Major Mental Roadblocks to Success
A part of you can't wait to dive into your new career -- but you're also smart enough to know that you can expect a few bumps along the road to success. By far, the biggest roadblocks exist between your own two ears!
Let's take a look at three common mental roadblocks and learn how to overcome them.
ROADBLOCK No. 1: Wishful Thinking
How many times have you wished you'd hit the lottery? Now, how many times have you actually won the lottery? Far too many people spend far too much time wishing when they should be dreaming.
So, what's the difference between wishing and dreaming?
Wishing is passive. We wish for things over which we have little or no control. We wish we were taller or thinner. We wish the waiter would hurry up. We wish our boss wasn't so [you fill in the blank].
The other thing about wishes is that they are often tinged with regrets about past decisions -- both big and small. We wish we'd ordered the fish instead of the chicken. We wish we'd taken the other job. We wish we hadn't let the love of our life get away.
Dreaming is different. For one, a dream is active. Unlike wishes, we can actually do something about a dream. After all, you don't "wish up" a plan, you dream one up!
You may not get everything you dream of getting, but two things are certain:
1. It doesn't take a single extra ounce of energy to dream big than it does to settle.
2. You've got a lot more to gain by shooting high than by shooting low.
ROADBLOCK No. 2: What If Everyone Thinks You're Crazy?
You've probably already thought about the people you can count on to support your plan to create a more meaningful work/life. But have you also taken stock of those you should make a point NOT to turn to?
Unless you come either from money or from a long line of pioneers, you may not get the support you want from your family. With the best of intentions, you may find your dream of quitting your job to pursue your dream career met with advice to "play it safe," reminders that "you're lucky to have a good job," or a lecture on the seemingly insurmountable odds standing between you and success.
No matter how old you are, or how much you deny it, family approval does matter. Which, of course, makes it all the more painful when the people we love fail to give us the emotional green light we so desperately seek.
Other people's fear, skepticism, and negativity can be as contagious as the flu. And unless you've built up your immune system, these dream stompers can knock you for a loop -- especially when they are right in your own family.
You have two choices. You can either continue to turn to these naysayers in hopes that they'll respond differently -- or, you can choose the saner path of acceptance.
Don't look for support from people whose life experiences have not prepared them to give it fully. Instead, take advantage of the support that really is available.
ROADBLOCK No. 3: Fear of Change
The closer you come to leaving the security of your 9-to-5 job (no matter how much you want out) the greater your level of excitement and trepidation (see "Word to the Wise," below).
Anyone who has ever ventured out of their safe little world will tell you they had doubts. But when it comes to making a major life change, not only is a certain amount of fear perfectly normal, it's actually helpful. For example, it's our healthy fears that keep us from jumping off cliffs. And the great thing about fear is that there are ways to get around it.
So, try laughing in the face of fear. Am I kidding? No. Ridiculing your fears is actually a very effective technique for banishing them -- because the mind rejects that which it considers absurd.
The trick is to turn your fears into a ridiculous event in your mind. That way, you allow your natural human reaction to absurdity to take over and dismiss them.
Try it yourself. Take your biggest fear and take it to extremes. Really exaggerate it. Let's say you're paralyzed by the fear of failure. Try picturing your entire family, all of your friends, your neighbors, everyone you went to high school with, even your boss, standing outside your cardboard-box home holding up signs that read: "We Told You So!"
Pretty ridiculous, right? When you realize that your worst-case fantasy is just that -- a fantasy -- what felt overwhelming will now feel much more manageable.
Another way to manage the fear of venturing out on your own is to start small. If the thought of just up and quitting your day job frightens you, start building your client base on the side. Begin with low-risk steps and gradually work your way up to the harder stuff.
Remember, courage is not a matter of losing your fear so you can take action; courage comes from taking action. And that, in turn, helps you overcome your fear. When you can act despite your fears, you will be rewarded many times over.
"Off the beaten career path" consultant, Valerie Young, abandoned her corporate cubicle to become the Dreamer in Residence at http://www.ChangingCourse.com, offering free resources to help you discover your life mission and live it. Her career change tips have been cited The Wall Street Journal, USA Today Weekend, Redbook, Entrepreneur's Business Start Ups, and on-line at MSN, CareerBuilder, and iVillage.com. An expert on the Impostor Syndrome, she's presented her How to Feel as Bright and Capable as Everyone Seems to Think You Are program to thousands of people.
MORE RESOURCES:
 Los Angeles Times | April job losses end state's eight months of gains Los Angeles Times Some of those who are discouraged by their job prospects have gone into business for themselves. (Francine Orr, Los Angeles Times / April 11, 2012) By Ricardo Lopez, Los Angeles Times California's labor market stumbled in April as employers in a wide ... Fla. April jobless rate drops to 8.7 percent, state loses jobs but thousands ... South Bay adds 3600 jobs, strongest employment gains for April in entire state Local jobless rate declines |
 Politico | Report: Wisconsin lost 5900 jobs in April BusinessWeek By TODD RICHMOND Wisconsin lost nearly 6000 jobs in April according to preliminary monthly data state labor officials released Thursday, putting Republican Gov. Scott Walker on the defensive as he faces a June 5 recall election. Recall Roundup: Jobs back in focus as new report shows losses Walker, Barrett continue sparring over jobs Walker and Barrett keep fighting over jobs number |
 AppAdvice | Steve Jobs TV movie to film at the original Apple garage CNET The garage where the first Apple computers were built will be used in the upcoming TV movie about Jobs. by Josh Lowensohn May 18, 2012 4:48 PM PDT Follow @Josh For those wondering how authentic the upcoming made-for-TV movie about Steve Jobs will be, ... Steve Jobs biopic to begin filming in garage where Apple was born Steve Jobs Movie Begins Filming in the Original Apple Garage 'jOBS' biopic starring Ashton Kutcher will shoot in Apple Garage and childhood ... |
Proposed arena a job killer, say Port of Seattle leaders The Seattle Times Seattle and King County leaders say the Port of Seattle can thrive next to a new NBA and NHL arena, but the Port sees potential damage to its plan to expand and add up to 100000 new jobs to the area. By Emily Heffter The sky is falling! |
Best and worst jobs for your health Fox News A healthy job is about more than just avoiding hazards, like dangerous material and machines. Employees need respect, benefits, wellness incentives, and control over their work, says L. Casey Chosewood, MD, senior medical officer for the Total Worker ... |
 Hollywood Reporter | Sorkin says Jobs movie won't be straight biography Reuters NEW YORK (Reuters) - Screenwriter Aaron Sorkin hasn't yet figured out how to put the life of Apple co-founder Steve Jobs on the silver screen, but he is certain it's not going to be a straightforward biography. Sorkin, who won an Oscar for his ... REFILE-Sorkin says Jobs movie won't be straight biography Apple Co-Founder Steve Wozniak Hired to Help Aaron Sorkin on Steve Jobs Biopic Aaron Sorkin Says Steve Jobs Film Won't Be a Standard Biopic; Apple Co-Founder ... |
 IGNN | Utah's job growth slows, unemployment rate up Salt Lake Tribune Data show that a sluggish labor market still has some vigor as nearly all sectors of Utah's economy added jobs in April. By paul beebe Job growth in Utah slowed in April for the fourth consecutive month and the unemployment rate rose, suggesting the ... Illinois jobless rate drops but job growth slows Illinois Adds 140700 Private Sector Jobs Since Recovery |
 Bloomberg | Who is the real jobs killer -- Obama or Romney? Fox News When it comes to the audacity of trope, it is hard to top President Obama -- a big time jobs killer. One of the president's re-election campaign websites features a new attack ad in which a steelworker brands Mitt Romney as a person “like a vampire” ... Mitt Romney's claim that 100000 auto jobs have been lost under Obama Fact-Checking Romney's Jobs Stats The Austerity Trap and the Jobs Deficit |
Santa Cruz County adds 3500 jobs in April San Jose Mercury News By JONDI GUMZ - Santa Cruz Sentinel SANTA CRUZ - Santa Cruz County saw a spurt of growth in April, adding 3500 jobs compared to March, and unemployment fell to 12 percent from, 13.7 percent in March even as the labor force grew. |
Summer jobs introduce kids to Uncle Sam, taxes Kansas City Star By STEVE ROSEN Expect to hear those words from exasperated teenagers or college students over the next few weeks as they set aside their calculators and toss their textbooks to start summer jobs. For many young workers, this will be their first time ... |
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